My home's just messy, not neglected...

What do I do to trick people into thinking “my home doesn’t always look like this” or “it’s been an off week”?

FAMILY:

Well, there is no tricking my sisters...we have helped each other emergency clean before mom arrives many times. But in order to convince mom that I’m not a slob I ALWAYS shove the dishes in the dishwasher and clean the inside of the microwave. She always marks the amount of “neglect” by failure to keep up with dishes and the presence of splatter in the microwave. Sometime during her visit I will hear about the state of the microwave or see her check it, it’s the first thing I attack if I have no time to prepare for her arrival.

FRIENDS:

For college friends I bust out with the miscellaneous sock hamper. They understand that laundry takes precedence over everything, sometimes to include hygiene. That and nobody likes matching socks.

For other types of friends I corral them in the living area by shutting doors and have a candle sitting on a warmer in an inconspicuous place. The positive aroma gives the illusion of organized chaos and helps them to relax amidst the debris.

MAINTENANCE PEOPLE:

I will live with inconvenience just as long as it takes me to clean the path to it. Then I will shut my cats in the messiest room so to discourage them from peeking.